Your Parents Raised You Right If You Still Do These 11 Small Things Out Of Respect
If you still do certain things out of courtesy — like saying “thank you” or holding the door — it’s a strong sign your parents raised you right. From saying ‘excuse me’ to helping an old lady cross the street, your parents raised you right if you continue these small acts of respect. These actions may not always be big or grand, but choosing to make the effort and show kindness to others indicates you were raised right.
Your parents raised you right if you still do these 11 small things out of respect:
1. You say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ without even thinking
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Your parents raised you right if you still say ‘please’ or ‘thank you’ without thinking. For the average person raised by good parents, this should come as a no-brainer. Whether it’s someone helping you carry your groceries or someone moving out of the way, it’s always polite to say ‘please or ‘thank you’ out of respect.
Even if you’re dealing with the most unreasonable or disrespectful person, remember: your actions say more about you than their actions ever will. This is why it’s essential not to forget your basic manners, because whether you’re at work or in a store, someone’s impression of you isn’t always easy to change.
According to a study published in Social Cognition, it takes weeks longer of consistent good actions to reverse a bad first impression. So, if your parents raised you right and you find yourself saying the basis, congratulations, people like you more often than not.
2. You hold the door open for people, even if you’re in a rush
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It’s all too easy to forget your manners when you’re rushing with barely any time to spare. Fleeting your apartment, you might forget to do basic polite things, causing you to come across as rude. Thankfully, your parents raised you right if you hold open the door for others out of respect.
In the real world, there have likely been too many times when someone slammed a door right in your face because they were either not paying attention or just seriously lacked some basic manners. However, not only is slamming the door in people’s faces rude, but there are also other consequences.
According to a study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, this is dangerous as feeling disrespected leads to greater aggression than being disliked. So, never forget those basic manners, no matter how late you’re running. Not only will this ensure you save face with neighbors or friends, but it’s also the polite and right thing to do.
3. You put your phone away when someone’s talking to you
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How many times have you been out with a sibling, first date, or a friend, and their eyes have remained glued to their phone for nearly half the time you guys were out? It’s awkward, but some people don’t seem to understand that going out with others should often entitle them to pay attention to them.
However, if your parents raised you right, then you likely put your phone away during conversations out of respect. It should be common sense, but many people are overly attached to their phones. According to a new study from Reviews.org, phone addiction is high, with nearly 43% of Americans admitting to being addicted to their phone.
So, while you might have the decency to pay attention, don’t be afraid to call out those who aren’t. A simple, “Hey, it’s okay to check your phone, but I do want to spend time with you outside of our phones,” can quickly remind your loved ones of their bad phone habits, forcing them to be more conscious of it.
4. You clean up after yourself in shared spaces
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If you’ve had the misfortune of dorming throughout college, you likely encountered the worst of the worst. From drama starting roommates to roommates who take your things without asking, sharing a space with others isn’t always easy. However, your parents raised you right if you clean up after yourself in shared spaces out of respect.
Once again, it’s common sense to pick up your clothes off the floor. However, you wouldn’t believe the number of messy people. From refusing to wash the dishes to never helping to clean the bathroom, someone taking on all the chores can have a profound impact on someone’s life.
For instance, according to a 2018 study, women who take on more chores experience higher conflict in the family, while men who take on more chores experience this impact in their workplace. However, when both are equally involved, it decreases overall work-family conflict.
So, while you might have common-sense manners, others don’t. This means you can either continue to do your part and refuse to acknowledge their actions or directly address their behavior and maintain that pressure on them. Either way, there’s no denying that sharing spaces is far from easy.
5. You treat older people with kindness and patience
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This may sound a bit traditional, but how you treat others truly reveals a great deal about a person. From their ability to keep their cool during disrespectful encounters, your parents raised you right if you respect your elders. Now, this one might be controversial, as most people consider ‘respecting your elders’ to be a bit outdated.
However, in many cultures, respecting your elders is a common-sense principle that parents instill in their children. According to Colorado State University, the reason why Eastern cultures treat older adults with respect is due to Confucian values. They continued, “Confucian values promote a positive view of aging, which encourages younger generations to treat older adults with respect, obedience, and care.”
So, while some people might not understand other people’s obsession with treating others with more respect simply because of age, there’s no denying that your parents raised you right if you do this. After all, showing basic respect to anyone is always admirable.
6. You go out of your way to include people who feel left out
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Most of you have been in this awkward position before: you’re standing there awkwardly as everyone chats around you. Feeling excluded, it’s all too easy to shrink within yourself and move to a corner. However, if your parents raised you right, then you go out of your way to include others out of respect.
Sorry, but if people aren’t including you in conversations, they are either really bad at social cues or are simply rude. And while this might sound harsh, there’s no denying that excluding others is even harsher. Whether it’s intentional or not, it goes against human nature to be alone.
According to a 2015 study, human beings are wired to connect, and this connection has a significant impact on our health. This means that if you’re going out of your way to include others, not only are you kind, but you’re truly taking into account how your actions impact those around you, which is a clear sign of respect.
7. You don’t interrupt when someone else is speaking
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There’s no greater annoyance than trying to speak, only to have someone cut you off mid-sentence. It’s not always intentional, but constantly being cut off mid-sentence is bound to ruffle some feathers. As it stands, most people want to feel heard when they’re talking one-on-one with someone.
Even if it’s a disagreement and both parties can’t seem to see eye to eye, listening and not cutting people off is the most effective way to resolve conflicts more quickly. According to a study published in the International Journal of Listening, active listening helps people feel more understood and provides better support.
So, your parents raised you right if you don’t interrupt others when they’re speaking out of respect. Now, will you get it right all the time? No, however, if you generally refuse to cut people off, then congratulations, you’re one of the very few that is aware of your behavior.
8. You make eye contact and greet people warmly
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Let’s face it: making eye contact while talking can be a bit intimidating at times. Whether people realize it or not, it’s not always natural to keep staring someone in the eyes while speaking, as most people feel the need to look away. But there’s a reason for that.
According to Dartmouth Department of Psychological and Brain Sciences, “Periodically breaking eye contact during a conversation will allow for individual creativity and higher levels of engagement.” Even so, your parents raised you right if you still make eye contact and greet people warmly. Despite what others may say, you don’t need to stare someone down to show confidence or respect. Simply glancing at someone in the eye and smiling warmly while greeting them is a huge sign of respect.
Even if you don’t particularly like the person, being kind, warm, and acknowledging can make the difference between showing respect and unintentionally being disrespectful. So, if your parents raised you right, you likely are respectful without even realizing it.
9. You keep your voice down in public spaces
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Have you ever been in the store and heard someone airing their dirty laundry out in the open? It isn’t enjoyable, but some people don’t know how to behave in public. From old or disruptive behavior to simply not understanding their surroundings, your parents raised you right if you avoid being loud or disruptive out of respect.
Nobody is saying you need to be a mouse when you’re in public; however, being mindful of your volume and aware of the time and place to let loose is important. After all, most people should know that the way you act at work versus at a party is completely different.
Similarly, the same should be said when you’re out in public shopping versus in the privacy of your own home with friends. Whether they agree with it or not, maintaining good manners is a reflection of you, so always strive to make the best of it.
10. You offer your seat when someone else clearly needs it
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There’s no greater rage in this world than seeing a woman with a child seatless, or worse, an uncomfortable pregnant woman being forced to stand. It’s unfortunate, but nowadays we live in a society that is entirely too ‘me-focused.’ As a result, some people will refuse to do the basic kind thing because it’s an inconvenience.
Thankfully, your parents raised you right if you offer your seat when someone needs it more. Now, if it’s a huge inconvenience to you, then don’t do it. While it’s nice, if you’re already struggling to carry a bunch of things, then it might not be wise to give up a seat you might need.
That being said, discomfort or minor inconveniences shouldn’t stop you from clearly doing the right thing. In other countries, such as Japan, it’s common courtesy to have these seats reserved, as Japan is based on a culture of respect. However, unless you were raised right, it becomes increasingly harder to find that same level of respect elsewhere.
11. You don’t talk trash about people behind their backs
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Finally, your parents raised you right if you speak kindly about others even when they’re not around. Once again, it should go without saying that doing the right thing should be a given. Regardless of what others may do, speaking ill of others should be considered a recipe for disaster.
Not only does it reflect poorly on you, but it also hurts the other person, causing irreparable damage in the long run. This is why people who were raised right don’t engage in this behavior. No matter how tempting it may be, you understand that speaking ill about others is always a reflection of you, not the other person.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor’s degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.
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